The night is so quiet
The moon is full
The sky is clear
The cliff is so stiff
And it feels like. . .
. . It’s time to die.
I just came back from the dead. A brother somehow needed me, looked for me, reached out his hands and brought me back to life. I will be forever indebted to him. But just when I start breathing and enjoying the nourishment of fresh air, a war was waged against my brother. And among those who are on his side; I am the weakest, the most fragile, and the most vulnerable. The attack was focused on me to hurt him. To protect my brother, I decided to run away from battle which made me branded a coward even though I was not afraid to die, nor in going back to darkness where I came from. What I am afraid of and can’t bear to see are those people I care for enduring pain because of me.
Before the war, I went to a friend to get my weapon and armor which I entrusted to him. But my friend said that it was long overdue and I can't get it back. I plead and told him that it is a part of my body. I’m going to war and I am powerless and nothing without it. But he didn't listen to my plea. Instead he added that my weapon and armor was already given to a friend. We are an ally fighting in a great war and he is referring to a friend who is also a friend of mine; a better warrior, bona fide and “unblemished”: unlike me. I decided to let it go.
“Our deepest wounds were not inflicted upon us by our enemies but by those who are us so close in our hearts.” arlenkalifuentes
Wounded and deeply hurt I yearn for the refuge of my best friend. Calling him from afar, I try to reveal to him what I feel without mentioning the war or the name of “that friend”. He must have heard the battle and he must have thought that I was referring to him and I had turned into one of his enemies, because he shot me with his most vicious arrow which numbs my whole body and almost stops my heart from beating. Like me, he is one of those who are capable of inflicting such pain and I can't blame him as he is also fighting his own war. There is no use of fighting back or to explain. He was in such a fighting mood and I felt so weak. Instead, after sending a message to the “Queen of Heart”, I went to solitude and seek the comfort of the forest mountain. And while lying on the ground face to face with the midnight moon, I ask the merciful “God of the unfortunate” if there's still a reason for me to live.
ArlenKaliFuentes
11:35 PM 4/15/2010
